Friday, March 24, 2006


Close, but no cigar!

This is a transcript, although by no means complete, of a sales call I received today. Fortunately I was bored and in the mood to have some fun. Normally they wouldn't get this much airtime.

*ring ring*

Gabby: Andersen Harvey, good afternoon.

Sales Guy: Can I speak to Gavin Kagan please.

Gabby: That would be me.

Sales Guy: I'm from *inane incomprehensible waffle*

Gabby: Pardon, can you repeat that.

Sales Guy: I'm from *again incomprehensible and something about how am I sorted with stocks and shares*

Gabby: Uh, well, that's not what our line of business is here.

Sales Guy: But you must be interested in making money.

Gabby: Well yes, but we make money a different way here - we're into logistics, not stocks and shares.

Sales Guy: No, not your company. You! Don't you want to make money on stocks and shares.

Gabby: Of course I want to make money, but I'm not going to take personal calls on company time.

Sales Guy: Why not?

Gabby: Well, I don't think my bosses would be too happy if I was discussing personal finances when I'm supposed to be doing a completely different line of work. If you want to talk to me you'll have to call me at home.

Sales Guy: OK, so can I have your home phone number?

Gabby: No.

Sales Guy: Well, what about your mobile phone number?

Gabby: No! What on earth makes you think I would give out those numbers to you?

Sales Guy: So we can discuss stocks and shares options to make you money. So will you give me your home number?

Gabby: No.

Sales Guy: Well then how am I supposed to call you at home?

Gabby: You're not. Have a good weekend! Goodbye!


Holy shit! I can't believe the pop-up blocker actually permitted me to comment!! Yeehaw! This is the best thing that's happened to me all week!

All I have to say is I'm glad I don't use have a land line because I HATE phone solicitors!!
Jennybabe - Welcome back...I republished my entire blog today which might have had something to do with you being able to comment again, but I have no idea what happened. So are you going to comment on all the posts you missed???!!!
You mean thing! I feel quite sorry for the poor muppets who have to degrade themselves to sell these stupid schemes. I normally just put the poor sods out of their misery early on in the conversation.

I often wonder what kind of uptake they get?
Ann - Ugh, I hate sales calls, and they're such a waste of time at work. I know that type of work is horrid (I did it for one day and one day only!) but this guy was a bit too happy on the phone so I toyed with him a bit more than I normally would!
He couldn't understand why you didn't want to take a personal call at work? What a moron. THEN he wants your cell phone number so he can make you spend YOUR money on HIS sales call? He's a moron and an idiot! Well played Gabby!
OGO - He sounded like a jumped up little twit to be honest, so I treated him as such.
Reminds me of one who rang me congratulating me on 'winning a new mobile phone!', it all sounded great until I pointed out to him the phone I had 'won' was the same one his company was giving away free with new contract sign-ups. Cue a rather embarrassed silence when I asked him if he was trying to tell me I had 'won' something I would have got free anyway had I wanted to join his rubbish phone company.
Serai - Ooh, that's just cheeky - good job you were aware of the deal on their contracts. It's nice to talk to these people when you've got some ammunition to throw back at them!
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